I haven't been around in a while but i had a thought bubble of a blog post.
It's something i'm praying about and contemplating current so i thought i would throw it out there and see what people think.
Please comment I would love some perspective on this.
So in modern day society you are taught to go to school, learn all you can, work like the dickens to succeed in your career and achieve the dream job.
Well that's what i have done. I went to school (twice) worked my tail off set a goal and smashed it!!! yay me!!
Now i have the job the one i was sure was my dream job. And well I do very well at it! good for me (patting myself on the back)
Where I struggle is what happens when you get the dream job??? turns out you still have to work like the dickens lol. Which is all fine and good but what happens when it's not enough.
"Do what you love to do and it will not feel like work "..... well what happens when it's still "work".
I have the dream job it pays well, has great benefits, awesome long term planning, working with amazing people and families yet still not satisfied.
Clearly this means i either picked the wrong "dream job" .....or.... something else is missing.
I don't leave work satisfied with the job i have done even though i work my tail off ...why you ask??
I just don't feel like other then financial gain that it adds to my quality of life.... in fact i think it diminishes my quality of life.
Don't get me wrong I work at a great place and am so very blessed to have the job I have.
I don't mean to be whiny or entitled i'm just not finding satisfaction in the "Dream Job".
Currently the sheer time of which my job takes up is robbing me of those things in life where i do find satisfaction and that is relationships.
It's ironic because i advocate everyday how important good healthy, supportive and progressive relationships make the difference of a well lived life (that's my job in a nut shell).
But in doing this i'm robbing myself and my family of .....well.....me.
I'm never home. I'm always stressed and overwhelmed. I'm frustrated and investing all my energy into something that isn't giving me life.
Now envisioning what a different "Dream Job" would be for me and of course i come up blank.
I have blogged about this before that I don't know if there is any job or career that i really think will give me personally quality of life.
I'm a person that works to fund my life.
I work so my future kids will have a home and food on the table. but i'm already sacrificing the quality of mother they will have.
I don't want to be a stress ball. I don't want to go on amazon to buy a thermometer and as i click the search box totally forget what i was looking for because i'm totally and completely overwhelmed !!! (this happened like five seconds ago).
I don't want to be unhealthy because I don't have time in a day to go to the gym or grocery shop for healthy food or even go to the flipping doctor.
I don't want my children to have a mom they never see. I don't want my kids to be 13 and struggling in school and say well mom can't help me cause shes never home.
This is the path i'm on and I hate it.
I don't hate my job i really don't . I hate what it take from me.
My passion for life
and my dreams.
So what happens when your dream job isn't a dream?
What do you do?
"For real help a sister out lol.... i'm really struggling"
More then what do you do .... but why do you have to have a dream job.
I get motivations of dreams i get that we live in a world where we use money as currency and they way to get that is working.
I get all the reasons why work is important.
I understand that some people LOVE working and love there career and feel it gives tham so much...
What happens when you are told growing up to be that person
and when you do grow up you just not.
I don't like working full time...
I don't believe that working give me personal satisfaction.
my passions and dreams are in my relationship.
I don't day dream about careers i day dream about children, my husband, my dog, my happy little home, my family, my goals, functioning for my family, i daydream about Love!!
Work does not love me back yet i spend endless hours a week supporting and giving all my energy for a non tangible thing that gives me no love back.
I get a lot of appreciation from the clients i work with which is always awesome but i hate to say it but i don't need it.
I do good work for the community and i am helping and giving back and all that jazz which is great, but when it stops being rewarding should it still be a focus?
I don't really have any wise answers or anyhting like that but would love to hear some feed back.
am i alone in this??
Am i crazy??
i don't know.
Let me know what you think.